Poem: "Bedspread" at "Ovunque Siamo"

I first started writing villanelles earnestly, compulsively in early 2023. That was the same year that my second book of sonnets, Periodic Boyfriends, came out and I was frankly looking for another traditional form to obsess over. I'd written a couple of villanelles before and both times, the poem ended up assuming a kind of stature in a larger work: The villanelle "Dear Rainer" is the opener for Fassbinder: His Movies, My Poems ; a villanelle is the title poem in my chapbook Untitled and Other Poems. At this point, I've written over 40 of them with the goal of eventually having 60 or so for a book. Five of them appeared recently in Ovunque Siamo, an online literary magazine devoted to new Italian American writing. I'm pasting one of those below but for the other four click on the magazine's link.

Bedspread

I have seriously wondered if I eventually said

The name of every Tommy, every Tony, every Pete

With whom I’d had sex or to whom I gave head

Would I capture the “me” in and out of my bed

Since we are what we eat. If we eat who we meet.

So I seriously wonder if I eventually said

What those dynamics were, even those I’ve misread

With the various men (regardless of sheath),

With whom I’ve had sex, to whom I gave head…

Would I do it again? Or refrain instead?

What encounters in life would I choose to repeat?

I still seriously wonder if I actually said

The name of each Vinny, each Victor, each Ed…

Would the resultant verse be profound? Indiscreet?

For I’ve had lots of sex. For I’ve given much head.

Do such sexual acts constitute my queer cred?

Did the boudoir instruct me as much as the street?

Does it matter who breeded whom? Who got bred?

Do your cheeks burn red? Have I lost my thread?

I wonder.

Photo Credit: The above image was taken by Kaufdex and is used by permission of Pixabay.